Shopping

I'm always shocked by the amount of porn available in the sex shops. Buckets and buckets of it. For every fetish, for every desire, for everybody.

So, Katerina and I went sex shopping.

From fake vagina's made of soft rubber to huge vibrating, dancing and singing vibrators, we saw it all. Condoms of every flavour and variety (note: business plan of the future: produce flavours including Elderberry and Apple and Mint and Watermelon), lubricants of every scent, taste and different degrees of gloopiness. There were also handcuffs of every sort, bondage gear which confused even me, cock rings and cock outfits for every occasion. All I could see that was missing was a cage. Then again, I wouldn't be surprised if they had one somewhere in flatpack form.

Katerina bought a cock ring for the BoyF and also a vibrator for herself. I lie, sex toys were for both of them.

In this respect, Katerina's sex life seems to have rocketed. Ever since the last 'break up' talk, the sex has improved and the BoyF is far more willing to do whatever he likes to her, regardless of how many vases and lamps fall onto the floor in the process.

On the discovery that Katerina had invested money on sex toys the BoyF showed apprehension. Firstly, as he'd never done anything 'like this' before. And secondly, out of worry that I might have been with Katerina when she bought these instruments. God knows I'd imagined him standing there naked with a vibrating willy if ever I knew anything. Katerina told him what he wanted to hear; that she had been all alone in the shop when she bought these things. That nobody would ever suspect anything.

Only time will tell what fruits her sex toys will bare. Whether the cock ring which doubles up as a clit vibrator will send them to orgasm city.

The BoyF insists that it won't make any difference to him.

In that case, we'll be wanting our money back.