Trial and Error

On Second thoughts, the ad needs changing.

M: 'The lady garden bit is too corny, soooo corny'.

Desdemona: 'Well yes, I did think that bit was rather odd'.

Now, dear readers, I'm anything but corny and odd and therefore one must rip out the lady garden and order a full landscaping.

I think I pussy footed (quite literally) around the subject. What I should have said was this:

''Hi there,

About me: 22, Male, Anglo-indian, slender build, 5 ft 8, dark hair and eyes. Sexually inexperienced. The body of a virgin, the mind of a whore, as I like to put it. Recently moved to London (a month old Londoner to be exact)

Am looking for an experience with a sexually active and confident femme. Somebody who will be my sexual mentor up until I graduate (from the sex academy ofcourse).

I want someone who is, to put it bluntly, willing to open wide and show me which bits needs proding, which bits to lick and which bits to insert my fingers and other devices into.

It might sound a bit scientific, but all I really want is someone who can teach me how to become a good fuck. The best fuck. Would prefer somebdoy slim yet curvy, attractive, clean and well kept. Above all, an open mind and a sense of humour is a MUST, so that if I'm crap, we can laugh it off.!''

Please reply if this could be you. (And I'm not some filthy perv...honest)

I look forward to your response.''


That should do it.