Common Julie

Common Julie’s Mum

Common Julie - "Can you kill 2 spiders i spotted in my room this morning? On bedroom ceiling otherwise i can't sleep in there"

Common Julie's Mum - "Is that why you didn't sleep in there last night"?

Common Julie - "No, i went to see another creepy crawlie last night".

Common Julie's Mum - "I hope he didn't sit on your tuffett Mr. Incey Wincey".

Common Julie - "No, but he ate my muffet".

Common Julie's Mum - "You've just crossed the line with that last one"!


Common Julie’s Dad

Common Julie got a lift to the train station today in her dad's van.

Dad: What time did you leave his then this morning to get back home?

Common Julie: 5.15am

Dad: Bloody hell, I hope the shag was worth it!

Oh dear.

Common Julie was in fact with her latest shag bag last night. According to information passed to The Dame from Common Julie, he knows how to use 'his piece' and his tongue, and incidentally has not given her the clap (as yet) so it can't be bad. And everyone wonders why The Dame is a big gay. . . .