How to end it

I have become increasingly aware of the different phrases used by many before the all important ‘it’s over’. Enjoy…

The worst ways to end a relationship:

5) ‘We’re two different people.’

4) ‘I feel like I’m walking with a dead person. You’ve really let yourself go.’

3) ‘Before I settle down I want to be single for a while.’

2) ‘I was overcome by a thunderbolt of lust and I no longer love you the way I do them.’

And the prize for least originality and serious wanker behaviour goes to…

1) ‘It’s not you. It’s me.’

Occasionally one wonders what sort of relationship these people thought they were in.