Ah...hello !
In high spirits tonight despite having nowhere to move to next week. Cardboard box with the word 'Whore in the box' is a possibilty. And yes, I could pop out and frighten you if you'd like, in true whore style.
Spoke with one of my friends earlier after what feels like a long long time. We used to work together in years past, folded socks and held the odd intellectual discussion all at the same time. And who dares to suggest that men can't multi-task!
Mercutio. He and I have somewhat reversed roles over the years. The most important of our dicsussions took place at work three years ago. Infidelity. It was and still remains my opinion (which might surprise you dearest reader), that people who are unfaithful with the mind are no better, worse in many cases, than those who physically dip their nib in some unknown's ink ( a quote used very appropraitely by The Dame herself). For the mind, yes, that time bomb ticking inside our cranium has few barriers. Our imagination is boundless, absorbing, lethal. For in our minds there is nobody to say a word. The people inside our thoughts are mute. Mute and fragile in comparison to ourselves, and rightly so. What would your partner think if they knew precisely what acts of butchery you had committed with the boy from the corner shop, or the gas woman, or even that executive who oozes with ripe sexuality. So ripe infact that s/he could rot were it not for you. Even though it was all inside your mind. If you actually went and had sex with them, would your partner be hurt some more. Would the wound be a little deeper.
And we should mention each and every one of those times when you are close to orgasm. At heaven's gate. The bubbling up inside of your desire, where you are tranported to the Lord himself. What about the fact that it's no longer your partner in your mind, but infact somebody else (you know what i'm talking about, don't you?) Would your partner be thrillled to hear that infact it was the thought of David Beckham's backside, or Naomi Campbell's cleavage that made you come. And not how they said 'you want it don't you, want it baadddl' Didn't think so.
So, back to Mercuito. I think we both agree that this is the case, that the mind is a weapon of mass destruction, and the physical leakages, are even more so...
The funny thing is, at the time Mercuito and I worked together, I was in search of THE ONE (yes, I have sinned, so I must confess). I refused to believe that experience counted for anything. Mercutio knew what experience was about, and has a lot under that belt of his (ha!). And look at us now. He has been in a 4 year relationship, they are going on a holiday (a proper, just the two of us, clarification of love issue, vacation) and here I am, writing..well...this blog.
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About me
- Tainted Visionary
- London, United Kingdom
- The Opening occurs like a dream, solid sand amongst parted waves, Each murmuring a hymn. Slowly. There I stand, and there you are, Staring into the abyss.
4 comments:
I totally agree with you that the mind is a weapon of mass destruction and that to mentally paint a picture of infidelity is just as bad as the act itself - selfish!
I couldn't disagree more more, my fantasies are of faceless men who I have never met, does that mean I am unfaithful?? Of course not, who I am I being unfaithful with, how could I tell my partner that I have let a faceless man or woman touch me in the way he doesn't? You can't tell me that the only person you have thought about or masturbated about is your current partner. Aren't we all unfaithful in some way at some point?
The theory of the faceless man is quite interesting. Are you sure he's faceless or is this just your dellusion so that you don't feel racked with guilt. Either way, it's not your partner's body that's making you go all tingly inside, it's that belonging to another man. Whether he be faceless, as you suggest he is, or indeed with a face, the point i'm trying to make is that at the moment in time, it's not your bf you are with, but in practice you belong to somebody else. Is it really that difficult to be with someone who turns you on so much, that when you are having sex wiht them you can only think of them. Perhaps you are confusing boredom in your relationship with your theory that everyone is 'unfaithful in some way at some point'? Wouldn't it be a sad thing if we all thought of somebody else (with or without a face), because, does that not mean that our physical sexual partner is merely a sexual puppet who licks the right places and prods the correct holes while we imagine that it was infact some other guy..?
It is not always the facelss man that I think of, I am merely saying that my fantasies involve this man. He is also in my thought when I masturbate. So, I cannot be turned on by someone else whilst I'm in a relationship?? Is that really what you are suggesting? My partner satisfies me (because why else would I stay with him) but there are things that I like that I wouldn't want my boyfriend to do to me as it would spoil the intimacy of what we have.
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